In general, I’d say I’m a relatively balanced person. I eat well but have the occasional cinnamon roll or ice cream. I exercise, lifting weights 3 days a week combined with daily walking and yoga practice. I prefer to go to bed at 9pm but will choose to stay up later if the reason is worthwhile. I read fiction and non-fiction, usually alternating between the two.
Balanced. Relatively speaking.
Now, that’s not to say that my life is a perfect act of balance, walking the tightrope with an essence of ease. I don’t believe that to be sustainable or realistic. What I do believe is that striving for a semi balanced lifestyle is the key to happiness, freedom, and success.
I started learning about German New Medicine over 2 years ago now. When I discovered this knowledge I was blown away. THIS! This is the thing that I have been searching for my entire life to heal. This will be the thing that heals me!!
It was so enticing to me, just like a shimmering blue swimming pool on a hot summer day. And so, I dove in.
I ordered books, listened to lectures and podcasts, read articles, followed other GNM believers on Instagram. I was IN.
And you know what, it was a really beautiful thing that finally helped me to let go of and release my attachment to toxic mold. I healed in leaps and bounds in a very short period of time. I was grateful for it and was telling everyone how powerful this knowledge is.
I wish I could say that from here everything was happy ever after and I healed every other ailment of my own and of everyone I love. Fairytale life mode activated!
But that wasn’t how it went.
It didn’t go that way because of two reasons.
Number 1 - I have a curious and questioning mind.
Number 2 - I am extremely observational.
I read all about the GNM beliefs surrounding mold and from the beginning it didn’t quite feel right to me. Based on my experience, I definitely understood that there was a deeply energetic and mindset component but I didn’t think that was the whole story. At the end of the day I think your mindset can only take you so far when it comes to living in mold. Eventually, the body will display symptoms if there are high enough levels of the right amounts of mold in that living space.
And so, with that I also began questioning other elements of GNM through the lens of continuing to learn and go even deeper into this belief system. By doing so I was observing the fact that there is so much drama and judgement in the GNM community. Like a lot of drama and judgement.
This, of course, was quite off-putting to me as well. If the community of believers can’t come together to share a common message, then how solid is the foundational teachings?
While I still believe GNM to be a component of a healthy lifestyle, I don’t see it as the be-all end-all of health and healing. This journey of pursuing it as the thing made me realize that there isn’t just one thing when it comes to healing, no matter how alluring the thing may be.
I have been in a lot of holistic health spaces that emit judgement of others. There’s an air of entitlement and superiority that is such a turnoff. It almost makes me want to go hang out with people who just got off their 21 day round of doxycycline for Lyme disease.
And you might be thinking right now that I am doing the same to the holistic health spaces as the people in them are doing to others. Maybe so, but I think it is important to discuss this topic and that involves bringing up the core of the topic at hand.
I see all of the drama and fighting in the GNM community and it turns me away. While I am heading on a different route I think of all of the people this knowledge could help and how the very people who are sharing it are the ones who are turning those people away.
I think about myself growing up when I was very much in victim mindset. I thought that IBS was a mystery disease that I’d have forever and ever. Managing it with Tums and Miralax were basically my only options unless I wanted to commit to heavier hitting pharmaceuticals. And for a while, I did. Prevacid was my partner in fighting the crime of acid reflux/GERD, until it stopped working, that is. In that time period I could have very well used the wisdom of Dr. Hamer (GNM founder) to assist me in stepping out of victim mentality and into a state of empowerment. Because at the end of the day, that was my biggest takeaway from GNM. I have the power to observe my displaying symptoms and to resolve conflicts that occur as a result of my perceptions of the world. Powerful stuff!
But when the communities that are the very bread and butter of this stuff can’t get along all that I see now is extremism and judgment.
It’s like holistic health has become a competition of who can be more “natural” and holistic.
I feel like we’ve lost the very importance of it all and instead have strayed to the far ends of the spectrum that makes us not relatable and our ways of living unattainable.
The very recognition of this has helped me to swing into my state of balance. I have come to a place of being centered. I found that embodying those extreme ways did not lead to happiness. Eating clean 100% of the time did not fulfill me. Obsessing over GNM, conflicts, healing phases, etc. did not lead to peace in my heart and mind. Spending time following and conversing with others who disguised their judgmental natures and orthorexia in the name of health, wellness, and healing did not foster beautiful friendships or connection. Instead, doing the opposite of all of that, loosening my grip, is what brought me the freedom, balance, and healthful mindset that I was desiring.
I very much like to live a life of both/and. Very rarely does it have to be either/or. I want it all. I want the healthy local and organic foods and I want the Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. I want to utilize the practice of GNM and I want to lean on conventional medicine practices when I deem it to be necessary/appropriate for the situation. I want to explore these “out there” concepts and I want to watch Love Is Blind on Netflix.
That is my definition of balance. That is my equilibrium. It lights up my soul and provides me with the opportunity to be my best self out in the world.
So often we are doing things for external reasons, jumping on the bandwagon of health trends on Instagram to fit it and to possibly find that thing without recognizing what works for us, what feels best for us, and what is most aligned for us.
Instead of looking around outside of you, take a bit of time to look around within you. What’s going on? What are you drawn towards? What do you want? Follow that, and as I always say, do things differently. Do them your way.
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